Sunday, 29 January 2012

The Great Escape

Breaking news...  A massive jewellery robbery took place in the early hours of this morning in a quiet village in Dorset. Our aerial reporter received an anonymous tip-off and was able to be at the scene of the crime just in time to witness the get-away...
Undercover work is 2nd nature to aerial reporter, Mr Chips
It was clearly an inside job, he tweeted. This lot are professionals, they don't leave any finger prints and are not above using the young ones to help in their perfidious activities. Using top of the range photo-technology, Mr Chips gave us his bird's eye view of the get-away:

The thieves made off with a collection of rare gems, necklaces and earrings. The worth of these is incalculable; we didn't have them insured, sobbed their hapless owner, I never thought that something like this could happen here. The thieves had planned their escape well - through the balcony doors and down into the gardens. Unfortunately our reporter lost sight of them once the thieves made it into the grass. Mr Chips apologised for this slip-up - my wife called and reminded me to bring back something for breakfast and by the time I'd finished with the garbage bins at the shops they'd scarpered!

If you see any of the individuals posted below you are strongly advised to call the police immediately and make sure your own doors and windows stay locked at all times. Trust no-one.

Could this be the 'ring' leader?

A clip-on earring from the 1980s, You can't find gems like this anymore

Mama - I'll help!

His prison name was Pumpkin, but now he's free and could be running in a field near you...

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

If household objects could talk, mine would say...

Photo by  Suat Eman   
The floor - I'll catch you if you fall...

Photo by luigi diamanti 
The Bed - Honey, don't go to work today. Don't even get up. You know I'll take care of you. Just lie back down, pull the covers up and s...l...e...e...p zzzzz
Photo by Idea go 
 The Chair - Sit up straight!! You have the worst posture ever.

Photo by Ambro
The Fridge - Yes, that's right, I am full of tasty snacks. Come and have a peek.  Just looking won't hurt...
Photo by  Marco Torresin  
The Loo - Back away buddy!! I'm tired of you sitting in here reading your books. Go use the chair for a change.

Photo by Daniel St.Pierre 
The phone - You have zero messages. What a surprise! Let's see, who's going to ring you next. Your mum, or Dr X, no wait... hmmm your mum or.... whatever. Loser.